


The Fairooz Rule

by JQ (musicmillennia)



Series: ColdWestAllen Week 2018 [1]
Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Humor, Laughing at the Founding Fathers is a Crime, Love Confessions, Multi, Time Travel, apparently, inaccurate history, seriously I'm not an expert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 10:59:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14851467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicmillennia/pseuds/JQ
Summary: [Day 1: Historical]"I love you," Leonard Snart tells Barry Allen and Iris West in a grimy 1770's prison.





	The Fairooz Rule

**Author's Note:**

> There are so many possibilities for this week's prompts omgggggg but work was a bit of a shit storm today. It's past 11 PM and I'm tired, so if this is rushed, well. Sorry.
> 
> This idea sprung from Desiree Fairooz. Look her up.

"I love you," Leonard Snart tells Barry Allen and Iris West in a grimy 1770's prison.

Iris, who's just unlocked the boys' cell, nearly stumbles. Barry  _does_ stumble, barely catching himself. Len, of course, strides into the dirty corridor like nothing happened to cover up the fact that something _definitely happened_.

"The others?" he asks.

"Uh," Barry says.

Len raises his eyebrow at Iris. Only to pause at Iris' narrowed eyes.

"Why so cold?" he asks over his shoulder.

" _Leonar_ _d_ ," Iris snaps, "If you're planning on walking away after that, I won't say it back."

Barry's instantly between them, hand on Iris' shoulder, other hand hovering over Len's arm. "Which means we want to get the chance to say it."

Len flicks his eyes between them. "We should leave."

"I love you too!" Barry replies quickly, flinching when Iris hisses his name. "What?  _He_ said it first!"

Which, yes, a huge step forward. Mick would call it a damn miracle. Doesn't mean Iris wants to let the evasion slide.

She crosses her arms and stares Len down. Barry glances nervously at her. Len keeps a cool expression, but Iris sees his fingers twitching in her periphery.

"Guards will come soon," Barry tries after another few seconds.

"No they won't," Iris replies firmly, though she has no idea.

Len clenches his jaw.

He takes one step forward.

As Barry brightens, Iris loosens her stance and smiles. "I love you too. I'd say  _we_ , but Barry already blurted it."

Barry scratches behind his ear.

Len smiles back, slow and small. "Cool."

Iris scoffs. "I was about to kiss you, too."

"Good thing I've got another pair of lips," Len says. Barry, the damn punster, follows the tug on his scratchy costume.

Iris would've joined anyway, but guards do actually come, and they're not happy about a black woman watching two guys kissing over their knocked out comrades.

* * *

"Why now?" Barry asks, fidgeting for the third time in thirty seconds.

Len grunts in displeasure. This is why he makes the plans. A hay cart.  _Really_. "Why what?"

"You know," Barry replies.

Iris, despite knowing how to stay  _still_ , shifts her head against the nape of Len's neck.

Len swallows. He can't exactly turn his back again, try a verbal tangent. Honestly, he's surprised a fight hasn't broken out yet with loud-mouths Boy Scout and Heywood in the driver's seat. There's no telling what'll happen if Len keeps his mouth shut.

So.

"When they were reading over the final draft and said 'all men are created equal,'" Len murmurs, "You made the most hideous snort I've ever heard."

Barry wriggles until they can sort of see each other through the hay. He's trying to keep his teeth hidden from the disgusting stuff, but his grin's splitting.

"And you," Len adds, moving his shoulder against Iris' body, "You laughed loud enough to make every slaver in there pop a vein."

"It  _was_ pretty funny to see George Washington squint like that," Iris says, obviously pleased. "He looked like a blind grandma."

Barry snickers. "Not even Rory can deny that he's a bit of an asshole."

"A  _bit_ ," Len drawls. Quieter, he says, "After that, I figured. Good time to do it as any."

Iris squeezes him tight. Barry―

* * *

"Set the cart. On fire," Sara says slowly.

Barry coughs. "Uh. Well. Lotsa friction plus flammable material―"

"Friction, huh?" Mick calls, eyebrows moving rapidly.

" _Mick_ ," Len, now in less-singed clothes, snaps.

"We have standards," Iris says, "Barry was just really happy. It happens."

Mick smirks. "Uh-huh."

"Scans indicate that no coitus has occurred within the last twelve hours," Gideon reports.

Iris buries her face in her hands. Len's wiped his expression clean.

"Hey!" Ray chirps in the silence, "At least we're all safe! Timeline's more or less intact, anomaly taken care of!"

"Except for a new record on the completion of the Constitution of the United States," Gideon says, helpfully pulling up a sketch of the convention...now including a laughing man in the front of the crowd, surrounded by a displeased glares.

"Of course they don't include Iris," Zari says flatly.

"Y'know what," Sara says, throwing up her hands, "Screw in the hay, don't screw in the hay, piss of the Founding Fathers, I don't care. Ray's right, the timeline's at least 80% what it's supposed to be. I'd say that's a win. Barry."

"Yeah?"

Sara points to the photo. "Remake that sketch. I want it in the library."

* * *

Gideon had made a nice wood frame for the illustration. Iris is, of course, included. Between her and Barry stands another man, just as lovingly rendered. He stands proudly, arms crossed as he stares down the slavers declaring false equality.

"What was it you said again?" Barry asks as the three of them look at it.

"Quote I heard once," Len says. "'Those who deny freedom to others deserve it not for themselves.'"

"Abraham Lincoln," Gideon says.

Iris' eyebrows rise. "You quoted a future President at the first President?"

Len's pleased as a cat, though he makes a show of shrugging it off. "Guess so."

"I love you."

This time, Len's the one saying, "Thought we weren't gonna walk away, Iris...Iris?  _Barry_!"


End file.
